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That nite like a nightmar playing over and over agin in my head dark scary and seeming to last forever
the kissing - i didnt mind
after all he was my boyfriend
the tuching - i didnt stop
after all he was my boyfriend
but it all went to far!
after all he was FUST my boyfriend
the night started just like any other
kissing, tuching, cuddling.
hugging, holding - movie going
i should have seen it coming
we kiss, this time he brings me in close
kissing me deep
he moves his hands one is on my brest, the other off my ass and into my pants
i flinch its the first time any one has tuched down there
he just keeps going
unbuttoning my jeans now
i feel him stop tuching and start to thrust his fingers intop me ~fingering me
i push him, but hes to strong, he doesnt buge
i quite kissing, but he keeps it up
she smilying - that bastord-
it stops only for seconds
it starts again. thistime theres more pressure
more thrust
more kissing from him
i push once more
still im stuck
stuck under neath him now
once more it stops
my thoughts start to race
wondering whats going to happen
he pulls me on top of him
i try to get off
he gets on top
and starts humpping showing me what he wants
he pulls me on the top once more and once more i try to get away
hes back ~in my pants he tryes again
only this time it hurts
i whisper "ouch" he keeps it up
i push him whispering a "no"
he still keeps his fingers in me i push once more and than again with force
he finaly is done with me and lest me go.
he looks at me
he injoyed that i can see the joy in his eyes
i get up and turn the movie off fixing my jeans and whiping the tears away
we go to the family room
he tryes again only this time i move away
he looks at me and asked if i liked it
i smile and say "yea.." with sarcasum
he tryes once more and just like before
i move
he look at his watch and saids " i think its time for me to leave"
out in the garage he gives me a goodnite kiss and drives off.
back in my room i sit on the bed thoughts still rushing still scared
at school it came up and he denied ever going out with me
but not fingering me
when i asked him what was "that" Saturday
his reply was simply " that" i do "that" to alot of girls
im pissed at him, but not cuz hes denieing going out with me but bbecause of what he did was wrong
and maybe it was my falt
but what does he think pushing means>
and hell i dont even no what you would call it !!
maybe its my falt for most saying "no" more or screaming or what not but why sould i bet my self up? after all, he was my boyfriend, or soo i thought.

 

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